The Beauty of it all...

So today carl and I had the oportunity togo hiking on the Colorado National Monument, outside of Grand Junction, CO. What beauty! I've seen mountains before, shoot, I've even been on and fell off mountains before! But this is my first trip to the "south western" US area, and I've have never had the pleasure of rampaging around in the "red rocks" of Western Colorado, and the veiws we had were simply breathtaking. Carl and I were constantly muttering out loud (which we do almost inceasantly anyway) about the beauty of God's creation, musing about what creative prowess, and deliberating as to wheather or not we had indeed found the perfect place to pee (we never did, or if we did find it, we didn't make proper use of it!).

Allow me to change gears for a minute (actually, you have no choice, i'm switching gears, willy-nilly as it were. You're only other option is to stop reading right now! But please don't...). We've had some incredible ministry experiences, both that we observed in others or were done to us by others. One of the latest of which was performed in the city of Greely, CO. We had the amazing opportunity of playing at the YFC's Higher Grounds coffee house/skate park. The Audience we had there was not our usual audience of church kids or Christian schoolers. These were the un-churched, or maybe even anti-church kids. And while we felt we were out of our league with them, both the kids and the folks who work there are simply incredible. Without going into any of the specifics, we were informed of how a church in the area had requested that the YFC staff STOP recomending their church to the kids who went to the skate park as they (the kids) made some of the members uneasy. At first I was livid, and wanted to go tell those so and so's what was up. But it was some something that Ryan, the YFC Director said that called me on my attitude- he said that he was not willing to complain or criticize anyopne or thing without attempting to be a part of the solution. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized that by my critical attitude I was actually perpetuating the cycle. Carrie reinforced that today in our team meeting when the issue was brought up when she said "it's easy to go around pointing fingers at the darkness, but it's a whole different thing altogether to go and shine a light there" (my paraphrase, as I can't remember verbatim what she said). And I was once again reminded of what an incredible ministry oportunity we have with CTI. We get to go around, and try to shine light into these places, both the churches and the non-churches. To be an example of Christ's love, of the Gospel's extension to all people. And to me that is such a beautiful thing...

While the beautiful remains, I am also convicted by all of this. First of my attitude- if I allow that anger to fester and mature in me, then I will be rendered inefective as a minister in that I will not be able to love those peole who have angered me. Secondly, I am the same as them. I point my finger at them and say "aha, you're the problem" or "I can't believe you are that cold" and I am the same. I do it to them, or to other that don't meat my criteria of "Coolness" or whatever. This is such a struggle for me, being of a naturally self righteous bent. But I'm wrong, and I know I am. God, change my heart on this. Make me able to love those who I believe to have wronged others the same way that you do. Give me Your eyes in all of this. Create in me a clean heart, oh God. And teach me to love as You have loved me.